A cut to the chase approach to creating lasting change in your life.
Showing posts with label live. Show all posts
Showing posts with label live. Show all posts
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Why You Must Bring Congruency Into Your Life
When you look at your life, how do you feel about it? Does it appear to be chaotic, confusing, overwhelming at times? Or does it appear to be a unified, continuous, joyful whole, progressing triumphantly towards your life goals?
Most of us live somewhere between these two extremes. Some days we’re “on a roll”, full of confidence and unstoppable. Some days we just seem to be running round in circles, burning all our energy, full of doubt and apprehension and getting nowhere.
So how to we get to spend more time in unstoppable mode, building our self esteem?
One key thing that we need to do is to live our lives congruently…
Lack of congruency is bad for your health!
Do you tend to compartmentalise your life – maybe you break it up so that your work life you do what has to be done to earn a living, in your home life you do what you enjoy and from time to time you try to make sense of it. And your health just gets a back seat.
Or maybe you break your life down in other ways – You're this person to your family and another person to your friends, someone else to your boss and so on…
When you live this way life gets complicated and stressful. You are constantly rushing from A to B, juggling different balls, trying to be different people in different contexts – and what happens when inevitably when two compartments that you have so carefully created overlap - your family meets your friends or your boss!!! Very stressful.
Trying to maintain all these different compartments burns a tremendous amount of mental and even physical energy. When you spend too long in one of your compartments the others start to feel neglected and your only solution is work even harder to juggle all the balls and keep them all in the air. Inevitably one gets dropped, all too often it’s your health or your personal relationships, and then you have real problems.
There has to be a better way to live
Luckily there is a better way to live – make sure you live your life congruently.
What if you only had 1 ball to juggle instead of 10 – you’d have no problem keep it in the air would you? That would be so easy – you could do it confidently, your self esteem would rise as you mastered the skill and you could even learn a few fancy tricks:-).
Carrying that analogy over to your life then, congruency is simply the decision to stop compartmentalizing your life and to start treating it as one unified whole. Making sure you live your life by one simple set of rules where everything fits together is the best form of mental self help.
It may well take you some time to rearrange yourself and your life to get into the state of congruency, but when you do, all the different areas of your life will fit together perfectly and mutually support each other. Your work will fit in with your own beliefs, your family and friends will fit together perfectly, your health and wealth will go hand in hand.
It’s time to review your life
To some extent we are all living lives that are out of balance, so take the time today to think about your life – where are the fault lines? Where are the incongruousness's? You may be a very lucky person and already have a well balanced life, but there is still room for improvement.
Then think about how you can rearrange things so that you can bring your life back into balance. What are the common themes and threads running through all areas that you can strengthen to make your life more congruent?
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Change your Perception
The mere fact that you are here with us on this site with my Daily Dose Of Good means that you are searching and there is a reason you are here. It's not a mistake you ended up here. You can begin to make different choices in your life today. We believe you are here for a reason. You are ready to know more and "see" more.
The one thing that is consistant in our lives is our belief about ourselves. When we are in full flight of an addiction or compulsion, we have lost a fundamental hold on the positive and true beliefs about who we really are and cannot see past the lies we are telling ourselves. -About ourselves.
When we pick up a drink, drug or engage in a compulsion, we are abandoning the fact that we all are perfect, spiritual beings inside, and getting caught up in the ego part of ourselves which always leads us astray. We are, as many great spiritual leaders have stated, a "double edged sword" or "a spritual being having a human experience", or as eastern philosophy understands, -we have a dual nature inside. There cannot be light without the darkness. All of nature is dual, including ourselves and the way we think about ourselves.
Everyone has struggles
There are chemical addictions and then there are compulsions, what some people want to call "personality quirks" and obsessions. We usually refer to these as alternative compulsions, and can include the obvious addictions such as gambling, sex addiction, compulsive shopping, workaholism, tobacco, weight - eating and not eating -as they say- pick your poison. We also include compulsions like reltationship addicts, people who sabotage themselves in relationships and even people who are addicted to "not enough" in both ways, -either they never have enough or they can never seem to get ahead no matter what they do. This is a person living in a consciousness of lack.
All of these are behaviors which have manifested themselves in different ways but lead back to the same core problem - what you believe about yourself, and how you react to the things that happen to you in life, whether your choice or not. It is always your choice to decide what your reaction will be.
Inner Talk
We argue inside on a daily basis. Minute to minute, you are talking inside, and the words and thoughts you have are forming YOU. The ego part of ourselves is in charge, and the real part of ourselves, our true identity -who we really are, is being buried by the part of us who is agressive, "right", fearful, apprehensive, "in charge", passive agressive, -all the extremes of our behavior which leave us "unbalanced" and looking to fill up our emptiness with something outside of ourselves.
Inside, we all want to be whole, and every cell in our being is crying out for this "rightness" within you to come to the surface and live an effective, fully functioning life that you can be happy about. Yes, you can. You CAN start to change your mind about yourself, regardless of the circumstances that are presenting themselves to you right now.
It is hard to see it when we are "in it" but if you can hang on to that little ray of positive energy that is waiting right there for you to tap into it, you can do it.
Is it all as simple as understanding and then doing? Yes. Changing your mind can begin today. Affirmations work, changing our limited negative self talk works. As you think, you are. As you think, you do. The concept is simple and at the heart of all succesful ways of thought, goal setting techniques and successful living. It is the basis of all of the books out now on "Intention". Meaning, that which we give our attention to, manifests in our lives. Really think about that statement and you will find it to be true. If you can begin to change your mind about YOU, and who you really are, you CAN change your life, and you can begin to do it today. You only have to want to.
It starts at the beginnning
Well, really? Might sound elementary, but a truer statement can't be found! The YOU that is here right now is the culmination of your experiences and beliefs about those experiences in your life. You are a sum total of not only what your life and experiences have made you, more importantly is that you are the person you are because of how your belief system has formed and what you believe to be true about those experiences, whether real or imagined, it doesn't matter. Siblings can grow up with the exact same parents and because they believe differently about the experiences growing up, they are completely different people. We have all seen this. We have also observed that there are trends, actions, abilities, ideas and lifestyles passed on from generation to generation to our parents from their parents, and to us. This is our family of origin and brings issues of its own to the table. This cannot be an "excuse" to act the way you do, but mighth be a parital reason why. Once we find this out, or realize this has happened, -it is time to stop the behavior with US, now...and rewrite the script of our lives. All the world is a stage, said a famous playwrite, and the movie or the play that are our lives have been orchestrated by us...whether we've been aware of it or not. Yes, there are certain circumstances that have occured that were beyond our control, BUT we chose the way we reacted to these events and circunstances, whether on our "auto pilot" or consciously...it has all been a choice. The good news is that WE CAN MAKE DIFFERENT CHOICES BEGINNING TODAY - no matter what the situation is right now.
What has happened is that those beliefs and ideas about what happens in our lives, determines our reactions to those events. And is the basic YOU that lives a certain way through them. People react differently to the same set of circumstances. How many times in our lives have we said that we "wouldn't be like that" and end up being exactly what we said we wouldn't be?
Who you really are - Live the life you were meant to live
Have you ever thought "I'm living someone else's life, not the life I thought I would lead". When we come here, we have a mission of growth that we really want to experience in life. When we get off track, we are unhappy and our real selves are doing all it can to imerge. Ego over-rides our lives like a virus in a computer. Pretty soon, you can't do anything with it that makes sense. We think that in order to cope with the pain and dissappointment that we've understood to be our experience, we need something to make us feel better. And the loop starts. We even argue for our limitations. "I can't help it, that's just the way I am"...Insert your own line. We all have something to work on in this life. We are all meant to live life as fully functioning, happy people being, and doing. Learning to change your mind, let go of all the things that are making us miserable, instead of hanging on to them can lead to the live you are really meant to live. Turn your "curse" into your blessing. You have an opportunity to turn a glaring obsession or disfunction into your greatest asset. You can live the life that YOU imagine.
Every Month A Million
The one thing that is consistant in our lives is our belief about ourselves. When we are in full flight of an addiction or compulsion, we have lost a fundamental hold on the positive and true beliefs about who we really are and cannot see past the lies we are telling ourselves. -About ourselves.
When we pick up a drink, drug or engage in a compulsion, we are abandoning the fact that we all are perfect, spiritual beings inside, and getting caught up in the ego part of ourselves which always leads us astray. We are, as many great spiritual leaders have stated, a "double edged sword" or "a spritual being having a human experience", or as eastern philosophy understands, -we have a dual nature inside. There cannot be light without the darkness. All of nature is dual, including ourselves and the way we think about ourselves.
Everyone has struggles
There are chemical addictions and then there are compulsions, what some people want to call "personality quirks" and obsessions. We usually refer to these as alternative compulsions, and can include the obvious addictions such as gambling, sex addiction, compulsive shopping, workaholism, tobacco, weight - eating and not eating -as they say- pick your poison. We also include compulsions like reltationship addicts, people who sabotage themselves in relationships and even people who are addicted to "not enough" in both ways, -either they never have enough or they can never seem to get ahead no matter what they do. This is a person living in a consciousness of lack.
All of these are behaviors which have manifested themselves in different ways but lead back to the same core problem - what you believe about yourself, and how you react to the things that happen to you in life, whether your choice or not. It is always your choice to decide what your reaction will be.
Inner Talk
We argue inside on a daily basis. Minute to minute, you are talking inside, and the words and thoughts you have are forming YOU. The ego part of ourselves is in charge, and the real part of ourselves, our true identity -who we really are, is being buried by the part of us who is agressive, "right", fearful, apprehensive, "in charge", passive agressive, -all the extremes of our behavior which leave us "unbalanced" and looking to fill up our emptiness with something outside of ourselves.
Inside, we all want to be whole, and every cell in our being is crying out for this "rightness" within you to come to the surface and live an effective, fully functioning life that you can be happy about. Yes, you can. You CAN start to change your mind about yourself, regardless of the circumstances that are presenting themselves to you right now.
It is hard to see it when we are "in it" but if you can hang on to that little ray of positive energy that is waiting right there for you to tap into it, you can do it.
Is it all as simple as understanding and then doing? Yes. Changing your mind can begin today. Affirmations work, changing our limited negative self talk works. As you think, you are. As you think, you do. The concept is simple and at the heart of all succesful ways of thought, goal setting techniques and successful living. It is the basis of all of the books out now on "Intention". Meaning, that which we give our attention to, manifests in our lives. Really think about that statement and you will find it to be true. If you can begin to change your mind about YOU, and who you really are, you CAN change your life, and you can begin to do it today. You only have to want to.
It starts at the beginnning
Well, really? Might sound elementary, but a truer statement can't be found! The YOU that is here right now is the culmination of your experiences and beliefs about those experiences in your life. You are a sum total of not only what your life and experiences have made you, more importantly is that you are the person you are because of how your belief system has formed and what you believe to be true about those experiences, whether real or imagined, it doesn't matter. Siblings can grow up with the exact same parents and because they believe differently about the experiences growing up, they are completely different people. We have all seen this. We have also observed that there are trends, actions, abilities, ideas and lifestyles passed on from generation to generation to our parents from their parents, and to us. This is our family of origin and brings issues of its own to the table. This cannot be an "excuse" to act the way you do, but mighth be a parital reason why. Once we find this out, or realize this has happened, -it is time to stop the behavior with US, now...and rewrite the script of our lives. All the world is a stage, said a famous playwrite, and the movie or the play that are our lives have been orchestrated by us...whether we've been aware of it or not. Yes, there are certain circumstances that have occured that were beyond our control, BUT we chose the way we reacted to these events and circunstances, whether on our "auto pilot" or consciously...it has all been a choice. The good news is that WE CAN MAKE DIFFERENT CHOICES BEGINNING TODAY - no matter what the situation is right now.
What has happened is that those beliefs and ideas about what happens in our lives, determines our reactions to those events. And is the basic YOU that lives a certain way through them. People react differently to the same set of circumstances. How many times in our lives have we said that we "wouldn't be like that" and end up being exactly what we said we wouldn't be?
Who you really are - Live the life you were meant to live
Have you ever thought "I'm living someone else's life, not the life I thought I would lead". When we come here, we have a mission of growth that we really want to experience in life. When we get off track, we are unhappy and our real selves are doing all it can to imerge. Ego over-rides our lives like a virus in a computer. Pretty soon, you can't do anything with it that makes sense. We think that in order to cope with the pain and dissappointment that we've understood to be our experience, we need something to make us feel better. And the loop starts. We even argue for our limitations. "I can't help it, that's just the way I am"...Insert your own line. We all have something to work on in this life. We are all meant to live life as fully functioning, happy people being, and doing. Learning to change your mind, let go of all the things that are making us miserable, instead of hanging on to them can lead to the live you are really meant to live. Turn your "curse" into your blessing. You have an opportunity to turn a glaring obsession or disfunction into your greatest asset. You can live the life that YOU imagine.
Every Month A Million
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